Parental Gatekeeping after Divorce: The Factors That Drive Divorced Parents to Meddle in the Relationship between Their Former Partner and Shared Child.

Maaike Hornstra , University of Amsterdam & Netherlands Interdisciplinary Demographic Institute (NIDI-KNAW)/University of Groningen,
Matthijs Kalmijn , Netherlands Interdisciplinary Demographic Research Institute NIDI/University of Groningen

We examined how often and under which conditions divorced parents act as gatekeepers and meddle in the relationship of the other divorced parent with the shared child. Going beyond research on mothers’ influence on father-child ties, we introduced a measure that captures the meddling behaviors of divorced mothers as well as fathers, as reflected upon by their (now) adult child. We studied three types of possible determinants: the interparental relationship, parent characteristics, and parent gender. The analyses are based on a representative sample of N = 1,024 adult children aged 25-45 who grew up with divorced parents in the Netherlands. The results show that about 25% of the parents were reported to engage in gatekeeping indicators, such as complaining about, avoiding, and being unsupportive of the other parent. The characteristics of the interparental relationship, including pre-divorce conflicts, one or both parents being blamed for the divorce, and the presence of new partners, were associated with higher levels of restrictive gatekeeping by either parent. Surprisingly, we found that neither the emotional problems nor the personality traits of the former partner were associated with the former partner receiving more gatekeeping. Yet, associations were found with respect to the personality of the parent who engages in gatekeeping. Finally, mothers more often acted as gatekeepers and meddled in the father-child relationship. To conclude, a sizeable minority of divorced parents engaged in obstructive gatekeeping, although other forms were found more frequently. Meddling was driven by sensitivities in the parental network and, to a lesser extent, by the traits of the meddling parent.

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 Presented in Session 68. Divorce and children